Misha de Sterk writes that his new book, The Death of Average, is geared to “leaders who wish to thrive in environments of complexity, fear, and rapid change.”
What better description is there of 2026?
In this excerpt, de Sterk shares his advice on how to effectively manage multi-stakeholder complexity.
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As organizations grow, projects attract layers of stakeholders, each with their own interests, fears, and mental models. In theory, this diversity should enrich decision-making. In practice, it often paralyzes it. Leaders attempt to solve complexity with more meetings — hoping that if everyone is included, consensus will follow. The opposite is true. Consensus-seeking dilutes accountability, and meetings multiply until the project slows to a crawl.
High-stakes projects rarely derail because of poor data or weak content. They derail because the human dynamics in the room — status, politics, fear — are unmanaged. A one-to-one conversation can already be difficult; a multi-stakeholder meeting can be impossible without skilled facilitation. Most leaders underestimate this. Organizing for growth is not about process alone. It is a meta-skill — a discipline in its own right — that corporations rarely invest in.
Here are some of my practical tips for navigating multi-stakeholder complexity — what I call the “stakeholder spiral.”
Map the System, Not Just the Organizational Chart
Stakeholders are not just people in boxes on a chart. They are part of a dynamic system of influence, power, fears, and ambitions.
Create a stakeholder map that includes:
- Interests (what they want to gain/avoid)
- Fears (what they might lose)
- Influence (formal & informal)
- Alliances & conflicts.
Update this map frequently. It’s not static – relationships shift as the initiative evolves.
Surface the Hidden Tensions Early
Don’t just ask “what do you think of this idea?” Instead, ask questions that invite vulnerability:
- What could go wrong from your perspective?
- What are you afraid we’re overlooking?
- What would make you resist this initiative?
By surfacing conflicts early, you prevent them from turning into silent blockers later.
Create a Shared Language of Value
Stakeholders usually disagree because they measure value differently. Finance looks at ROI, marketing looks at brand equity, R&D looks at feasibility, HR looks at people’s impact.
Develop a common decision framework (e.g., “opportunity size, feasibility, strategic fit, cultural impact”) so people aren’t talking past each other.
Use “Small Wins” to Build Trust
In complex systems, bold visions often trigger skepticism.
Break the initiative into low-risk experiments that generate proof points. Each win reduces fear and builds credibility, especially with resistant stakeholders.
Balance Transparency with Selective Engagement
Share enough information so stakeholders feel included, but don’t overload everyone with every detail.
Be strategic about who needs to be deeply involved, versus who needs reassurance. Over-involvement can paralyze; under-involvement breeds suspicion.
Train Conflict Competence
Invest in building conflict competence within the team:
- Normalize conflict as a signal of progress, not dysfunction.
- Teach people to distinguish between productive conflict (different views on the work) and destructive conflict (ego battles, turf wars.)
Anchor in Purpose, Not Just Metrics
- When complexity gets overwhelming, people retreat into defending their turf. Purpose cuts through.
- Reframe conversations back to: What are we here to achieve for the consumer? For the company? For society?
- A strong, shared purpose keeps people aligned when metrics and incentives pull them apart.
Create a “Safe-to-Say” Zone
- Stakeholders often avoid honesty because they fear political or reputational risk.
- Establish rituals (closed-door sessions, Chatham House rules, anonymous inputs) where stakeholders can voice doubts and objections without repercussion.
Accept That Not Everyone Will Be Happy
- Complexity management is not about eliminating resistance, but balancing it.
- Sometimes you need to move forward knowing that a stakeholder is only 60 percent on board. That’s okay if they’re not in a critical blocking position.
Train Yourself to Hold Opposites
- As a leader, your job is to be comfortable with paradoxes: efficiency vs. innovation, stability vs. change, global vs. local.
- The ability to hold two opposing truths at once — and to help stakeholders live in that tension — is one of the most powerful skills for leading in complexity.
Excerpted from the 2026 book The Death of Average, by Misha de Sterk. (Featured image by Reid Zura on Unsplash.)
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